Sad but True

My grandmother was never what you called a cuddly loving Grandmother. She always seemed a little distant, but she was my only living Grandmother and passed when I was 12. So everything seemed normal to me. The last few days I have spent some time out of curiosity looking up some old death certificates. They are interesting in the fact the give the date, time, and cause of death. Come to find out my dear grandmother buried two sons. One from drowning in a auto accident and the other from suicide. I have heard these stories when I was young but they were just stories. Now I realize the pain connected with each tragic incident. I too have lost a son to a tragic accident, but thankfully I haven't lost my ability to show my affection to those I love. I didn't know Grandma's were supposed to put their arm around you, snuggle you, kiss the top of your head and tell you how sweet you were. No wonder I was jealous of my nieces and nephews, my mom was always a kind and loving grandma, and when I think back I am sorry I missed that, but now I guess I understand.